Thursday, September 11, 2008

I'm Rich! I'm Rich!

I got this email today.

URGENT NOTIFICATION TO THE OWNER OF THIS EMAIL ADDRESSDear Internet User,We are pleased to inform you of the result of the E-LOTTERY NL. InternetPromotional Draws. All email addresses entered for this promotional draws wererandomly inputted from an internet resource database using the SynchronizedRandom Selection System (SRSS).Your email address was selected in the Category "A? with ReferenceNumber NL 80OS 9414 Batch Number: 444821545-NL/2008 and Ticket Number: PP 3812 /2008-03,and this qualifies you to be the recipient of the grand prize award sum of$2,500,000 (Two million, five hundred thousand dollars).The payout of this cash prize to you will be subject to the final validationsand satisfactory report that you are the bonafide owner of the winning emailaddress.In line with the governing rules of claim, you are required toestablish contact with your designated claims agent via email ortelephone withthe particulars below:Name: Mr. Robert WilliamsPhone: +31 64 544 9390Email: robertwilliams008@yahoo.cnYou are advised to call the Claims agent for confirmation or provide thefollowing information for processing the payment of your cash award.DATA PROFILENames:Telephone/Fax number:Nationality:Age:Occupation:Winning Reference Number:Failure to complete the claims of your cash prizeafter 14 days of this notice will result in the revision of award. Hence, youshould commence your claims process immediately, by contacting theclaims agent(Mr. Robert Williams) who would be guiding you through the Claims process.Congratulations on your Winning Prize and we look forward to completing yourpayout soon.Yours Faithfully,Dougherty MildredLottery Co-ordinator.N.BKINDLY RESPOND TO THIS EMAIL EITHER BY CONATCTING US VIA TELEPHONE OR SEND ANEMAIL TO message was sent using Manhattan College Webmail.

Riiiiight. The Netherlands want to give me money. And they use a Manhattan College Webmail address as their main server and a hotmail address as a contact number. This looks like it is on the up and up. I'll send them all my personal info right away. After all, I'm tired of having any money. (wait, I have money? From where?) I'll just let them have my money. (where am I getting this idea. Clearly I am delusional) Surely they wouldn't rip me off. It's a government, they don't rip people off. (okay, that's it. Clearly I have lost the 2 brain cells that I had that were still functioning. ) Wait, the Netherlands pays their lottery winnings in dollars? Cool, that will make the exchange easier. Wait, is that American dollars of Canadian? Hang on, the email is from Manhattan so it would be American dollars. Hmmm, how's their currency right now? Do I want it in American dollars? How many Canadian dollars would that be...l;ksdlkffhjjsp

Hi folks, my momma haz lost her mind, I haz bumped her off the computer and am sending her into the kitchen to open up a can of tuna for me.